What are the essential characteristics of being a good parent?

Communication is an essential ingredient within every contented family.





To my mind, everything revolves around listening, but you can't listen if you do not communicate





I may be in my 50's, but I still remember my teenage years and the fact that adults never listened to what we teenagers were trying to say.





I tried very hard with my own kids. I did my level best to listen. And guess what? I suddenly found myself not just HEARING what they were trying to tell me, I UNDERSTOOD what they wanted to say, and I was able to empathise with them. I remembered my own feelings of confusion and as a result could feel theirs.





My eldest son is now in his thirties and my youngest is almost 26, while my daughter is in the middle. I was and am an exceedingly lucky parent.





During their teenage years, there was never any problem as regards being cheeky, rude, running-away, or being told that they hated me. In fact, I truly enjoyed their teenage years. They talked, I listened. I talked and they listened.





Something else I discovered during those wonderful years. Our children can be, and are very knowledgeable and wise about a great many subjects, perhaps not the same subjects that we are wise and knowledgeable about, but then, they are growing up in a different time than we did.





Please listen to your kids so that they can communicate with you and then you in turn with them.





Other than than that, always show a calm facade, never ever let them know that they have shocked you about anything, no matter what you might truly feel. Only discuss or deal with the matter at a later stage when you are truly calm,





Look after yourself and be safe





Sandy


http://www.moms-home-safety.comWhat are the essential characteristics of being a good parent?
i'm not a parent...but I would say unconditional love, support your child in what ever they decide, discipline whenever it is required too..Really, be a good role model...if you are a good person than your child will be a good person....What are the essential characteristics of being a good parent?
listen to them when needed but always be consistent if you break your rules once or dont go through with what you say then you lose that ground of them knowing that you will do what you say !
love %26amp; patience
Patience, unconditional love, understanding and judicious discipline when needed.
for me being a good parent its all about, rules keeping hem being a good listener,love them understand them, treat them with respect, have patience and still being able of discipline them. Take good care of them i think they call it tough love. And it has nothing to do with spanking a child I strongly believe that when you spank a child it is you who has lost control not the child. Being consistant with the rules and taking with them all will be fine. Comunication is the key.
being there when your child needs you. love them. take care of them. be a parent, not their friend, that doesn't work.
Good question. Here are my thoughts....





Being attentive to a child's needs, loving them unconditionally, playing with them every chance you get, being patient with them, teaching them what's important, leading by example, and being consistant and fair with discipline.
Parenthood is one of the most fulfilling experiences any species can have. There is a natural instinct that seems to come naturally to a new parent, but there are bits of advice that can help when you are challenged in the growing up years. The most important thing however, that any parents can instill in their child, is a sense of being loved. Remember also, that parenting does not stop when when a child grows. Being a good parent remains for life.


Steps





1. Set rules that would apply to any person in order for them to lead a happy and productive life. Be clear and balanced in communicating these to your kids. Show them by example, not only by verbally teaching. Children have a tendency to become what they see and hear. It is rare, but does happen, that a child will, of their own accord and strength, break out of a negative and hateful home environment.


2.


Talk to your child when he or she acts out in a harmful and spiteful manner. Be assertive, yet kind, pointing out what they have wrongly done. Be consistent in your teachings and do not let your child manipulate you into making exceptions. When enforcing consequences never act in anger. Remember that children imitate their parents verbal expressions. Teach them by showing them how to react in certain situations. Set boundaries so to teach them that they have limitations. By doing so, they actually get a sense of being loved and cared about by their parents. They might rebel at those boundaries, but inwardly enjoy knowing that they are loved by concerned parents.


3. Take interest in your child and be involved in his activities. Really listen to them, when they talk to you. Make them understand, by you actually telling them, that they can and should come to you when they have a problem. When they do, do not judge them but truly listen to them and guide them. Do not say one thing, and then do another. If you tell your children, that they can openly tell you if they have tried drugs, and then, when they talk to you about it,do not suddenly become angry at them. This is a moment for you to tell them, that you understand that they wanted to try it. Explain to them, calmly all the dangers involved with taking drugs. Omit nothing at all! Then, still remaining calm, tell them that now they know all the dangers, that they can make their own decision about taking drugs and walk away. They will think about what you had said, will understand all the perils of drugs, will not take them, and trust you in the future to help them and listen to them, without anger or judging them. You have now established a good relationship with your child.


4.


Respect their boundaries as you would want them to respect yours. Even a young child will understand and abide by the limitations set upon them. Instill in them, a sense of belonging, and of being loved. When you teach a child that your room, is out of boundaries to them, respect the same with their room. Allow them to feel that once they enter their room they can know that no one will look through their drawers, or read their diaries. At the same time, teach them to clean their room, and make their beds every morning. Even the youngest of children, should and can learn to tidy their room and put their toys away in the box at the end of the day. As your child grows, give them more responsibility, and at the same time give him or her more privacy.


5. Be a role model and try to live by the rules you set. It is difficult to teach a child the reasons they should not smoke, when they see you smoking. At the same time, teach them moderation, and responsibility that goes with, drinking, once they are old enough to be interested in it. It is perfectly normal to see you drinking at a party, or perhaps to have wine before a meal. This way they will not feel that they have to sneak around, when the time comes that they also would like to sip a bit of wine. Make sure, however, they aware of at what age you feel they can enjoy a drink with friends, and that they know about having a designated driver, if they drink at a party. Teach them about 'never drinking while driving', and 'never be a passenger in a car with someone who has been drinking'. If you are not open about these, they will sneak around and do it anyway. This way, you have established a relationship with your child, you have taught them to always be open about what they do, and that you trust them, and will always be there to help and assist them. You must be a parent first and friend second, to gain the trust of your children.


6. Never compare your children with others or even with siblings. Each child is and individual and unique. By not accepting this and by invalidating them and not recognizing them as being thus can tear down a child. Recognize each for their differences, and instill in each the desire to pursue their own interests and dreams.


7. Never shame or embarrass your children in front of other people. If they have done something wrong, if they have hit a child when they should not have, take them aside, and teach them privately. Teach them what is right and wrong, and then be stern, but not cross, when you tell them that you expect them never to do that again.


8.


Find some time to spend with them, and be with them alone. Set aside a day to spend with them, to go to the park, or theme parks. Perhaps a day to take a trip to a museum or a library depending on their age interests of course, but make them feel that they are a part of your life, and you are a part of theirs. Dinner times, talk to them. Turn off the TV, and speak about childhood things, and listen to them closely. Meals times should be family time. If, because of job responsibilities you cannot have dinner at an early hour every day, make sure that the time you do eat with them, is their time. At the same time, share your experiences with them. Allow them to be a part of your life, even when you are away from them.


9. Think about your childhood, and the mistakes YOUR parents made. Try to avoid making terrible mistakes


10. Parents should not fight or argue in front of their children even if you think they are sleeping. Save your arguments for the time you have alone with each other. Children feel insecure, and fear divorce, when they hear parents bicker. They learn by what they hear, and soon siblings will learn how to fight with each other. Teach them by showing them, that while people do not and probably should now always agree, there are peaceful ways to discuss their differences, by talking, and not fighting.


11. Try not to take sides when your children are quarrelling for fear of showing them favoritism. When you see them becoming extremely angry at each other, step in and discuss with them the problem they are having. See if you can help them, by not showing that one is wrong and the other right. Find a solution so that both of them can agree to terms, and walk away happy.


12. Never accuse others for your failures. Explore the mistakes which caused such failures and share them with your children. This will encourage their own introspection when they taste failures later in their life.


13.


Keep giving positive strokes. A gentle cuddle, a little encouragement, appreciation, approval or even a smile can go a long way to boost the confidence and well-being of your children. Give them this in abundance or else they may wander in search of a substitute by joining a crowd.


14. Teach your children that it is okay for them to be different and they do not have to follow the crowd. Teach them right from wrong when then are young, and they will always be able to make their own decisions, instead of listening to others.








Tips





* Remember that your child is not an extension of yourself. Your child is an individual under your care, not a chance for you to relive your life through them.


* Attend school functions. Do homework with them. Visit their teacher at open house. Even if it means taking some time away from work. Remember the children grow fast, and soon will be on their own. The time you have now with them, should bypass the time you have at work.


* Show them love, respect, and trust. Children should be very familiar with the consequences of their actions.








Warnings





* Do not be afraid to be a 'parent'. Teach them the rules of the house, teach them the laws of the country, teach them how to be safe, and if you are religious minded, take them to the church/synagogue/mosque/etc. of your denomination. Do your best, be their friend, but never let them forget you are their 'parent'. If you give them a punishment, do not back down because they might plead with you or cry. Remain steadfast and they will thank you later. However, always allow them to be secure in your love and concern for them.








Hope it helps.Good Luck!!


):-)
Love, respect, patience, and knowledge.





Love your child and be willing to do whatever you need to do to keep that child safe healthy and happy





Respect you child as an individual.





Have more patience then they have fight. When they are being difficult you need to be able to wait them out and still keep your cool.





The more you know about your childs surrounding and the people they come in contact with the better. Read books on what you don't know and look for ways to improve your parenting skill. You will both benifit.
give your kids your time. not your beer
For me, I teach with my head and my heart rather than with my hand or belt.


Avoid overindulgence.


Protect them by giving them a safe environment.


I feel good about myself, therfore it reflects on my children.


I guide and teach my children through example which means I respect them, set firm limits in a warm demanding way.


I am not permissive at all.


I don't threaten, insult, humiliate, control, micromanage or teach through fear by hitting.


I have a high level of responsiveness and praise their efforts.


I believe that both the child and parent have certain rights and their needs should be equally met.


I make sure my children's social, emotional, physical and intellectual needs are met.


I teach them to respect others.


I shower them with hugs and kisses every day.


My hubby believes in this too so we make a great team.


So we both feel we are good parents because we put our marriage first and our children join our lives. We have lots of laughs and good times!


We nurture our bond and that reflects on them to have a healthy relationship with their spouses when they become adults.


Hope this is inspiring to you.