We have a 9YO son and this is something we've already committed to doing--trying to get some constructive perspective and thoughts from varying view points We are a caucasion couple who have an opp to adopt a biracial baby. Looking for adoptee, parent input etc?
We (a caucasian couple) adopted two children from Liberia. There are some unique challenges to transracial adoption. Not insurmountable challenges, but they do exist and do need to be acknowledged.
A few things to think about:
Caring for ethnic skin and hair, which is very different from Caucasian skin and hair.
Teaching your child about racism when it's something you've never experienced.
Trying to instill a sense of pride in a culture and ethnicity that you don't share.
Also it's worth mentioning that transracial families are ';visible'; families. Everywhere we go, heads turn. People notice us and stare. Not necessarily disapproving stares, but we just aren't one of those families that blend in.
Your homework is to go someplace where you are the only Caucasian in the room and your presence will stick out. I remember the first time I walked into an ethnic hair salon with my daughter. All conversation stopped and everyone looked at me.
It's a good exercise to change your perception.
Let me recommend a couple of books: Inside Transracial Adoption and In Their Own Voices. Great resources.
Best of luck to you.We are a caucasion couple who have an opp to adopt a biracial baby. Looking for adoptee, parent input etc?
My wife and I are caucasian and our oldest daughter (almost 16) is East Indian while the baby is First Nations. Both were adopted and both share a caucasian sister (in the middle) that was born to my wife and I.
Our experiences have been generally positive and I think that is due primarily due to the fact that we have always been an interracial family from the first adoption. It's just always been part of who we are as a family. We never recieved any negative comments from anyone here in Canada although we did have one incident on a trip to upstate New York but I just chalk it up to an ignorant individual.
The addition of the First Nations baby this past spring has only added to the uniqueness of our family and in fact the social worker who did the placement stated she would prefer she go to a mixed race family. In most parts of Canada, First Nations children can only be adopted by other First Nations families unless they don't have Native status which this little one doesn't. Her only choice was to be adopted by a caucasian family and since we were already multi-racial it was just a good fit.
As far as advice goes, I would just suggest that you learn as much as you can about the racial culture of any child you adopt so that you can incorporate that into your family as much as possible and as much as the child wishes. I don't mean to beat them over the head with it but at least be aware and open. My East Indian daughter has no interest in India since she has been raised in Canada since she was 3 1/2 (we adopted her at 8 months old while we were living in India and didn't return to Canada till she was 3 1/2). We've always talked about India, gone to different East Indian cultural events as they come up and tried to keep that alive in her but she eventually decided that she is more Canadian and doesn't have the interest any more. At least she had the exposure though and as a result all of my children are very tolerant of other cultures and races and are very aware of them in our society. If you do the same then the adoption should be successful and you, your spouse and son will only benefit as well.
What races are the child? I would say it all depends on you and your husband and your families. I'm sure at some point you will get stares or comments, but if you and your husband feel good about it, then thats all that matters. It would also be easier if you came up with replies to that stuff ahead of time, so your not put on the spot. I was watching Oprah I think or Dr. phil the other day about kids who were abandoned at birth. They had a african american girl on there who was left at the Delta Ticket counter at a few days old. Anyway, she was adopted by a white family and raised in a mostly white community. She said she was the only black girl at her school until 7th grade. She ended up becoming Miss Kansas. She was such a sweet girl and showed such love for her parents. I think it really just depends on how you raise the baby, is how they will feel about their situation. If you could give a baby a loving home, then go for it.
Basically there are more bi-racial children without homes than there is bi-racial adoptive parents so to balance number some will need to be adopted by caucasian couples. I would definately go for it but be prepared that if you race does not match that of your child they will have some additional issues to work through as they may not feel they fit in with the family and you may get some rude comments from ignorant people.
I say go for it. If you want to adopt a baby that is biracial, I think it's great.
i don't think race is as much of an issue as separating a child from it's mother.
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